Grandma Deaths
April 23, 2002, 7:16 p.m.

A Preliminary Report on an Intervention Designed to Reduce Grandmother Death Resulting From College Exams

Lee Jussim
April, 2002

Background
Adams (1990) was the first to document the crisis in grandmother deaths resulting from college exams.  He discovered that the rate of grandmother mortality rose 10-20 times just prior to the period of exams, when compared to the ambient mortality rate at other times.

Adams (1990) speculated that the most likely cause of death was inordinate grandmotherly stress at the thought of her grandchild taking a difficult exam. This interpretation was further strengthened by findings that the worse students� had been performing in the class, the greater the likelihood of at least one� grandmother dying prior to an exam.  Grandmothers probably experience particularly acute stress at the thought of their grandchildren taking a test� in which they are unlikely to do well.

He also proposed three possible solutions:

1. Stop giving exams.  Adams concluded that this would prevent colleges from evaluating the competence of people interested in becoming doctors, lawyers, engineers, MBAs, teachers, etc.  Therefore, colleges would not longer be able to train these and many other professionals.  As a result, the economy would come to a grinding halt.  This did not seem to be a good idea.

2. Only admit orphans to college.  This would be a good idea except for the paucity of orphans.

3. Have students never inform their families that they are in college. This would work if feasible.  Students could tell their families they are going off to work (if they live at home) or to join the armed forces (if they live on campus).  The lack of income, however, might eventually become noticeable in the first case. Joining the armed forces (or a religious cult) would seem to have more potential to work as an enduring deception.  However, both options would likely stress grandmothers at least as much as college exams, so that it is not clear that either would lead to much net reduction in premature grandmother mortality.

Click here to see Adams (1990) original research report.

Because all three of these interventions seem unsatisfactory, our crack research team designed something altogether different and workable, and which has none of the flaws of Adams' three proposals.

The Intervention
Over the last several years, we have instituted the following intervention, designed to reduce the frequency of premature grandmother mortality. Students are informed that, should they miss a major multiple choice exam, they will have an opportunity to take the brutal essay makeup. The means on this test typically range from F-D, whereas the
means on multiple choice test range from about C+ to B. It is extremely important to the success of the intervention that students be informed about the difficulty of the brutal essay makeup well before the first multiple choice exam.

Results
Prior to instituting this intervention grandmother mortality around test time approximated the results found by Adams of .5-1 grandmother death per 100 students.  This intervention reduced that rate to .1 death/100, which although still slightly higher than the ambient .05/100 rate of grandmotherly death without an exam, is still much lower than that typically found for most college classes around exam time.

Discussion
It is clear that we have developed a highly, though not completely, successful intervention for reducing grandmothers' risk of death around student test-taking. Just why this intervention works, however, is not clear.  One possibility is that the thought of the brutal essay make up is so horrible that the main test, by contrast, seems less threatening, thereby reducing grandmotherly stress.

Another possibility stems from students' increased motivation to stay healthy and attend class the day of the test (rather than take the brutal essay makeup).  Perhaps they begin working out at every opportunity, including with their grandmothers. Because of their increased physical fitness, the grandmothers become less susceptible to the stressful effects of their grandchildren's exams.

The full and complete reasons why this intervention has been so successful may never be known. Regardless, it has been extremely gratifying to provide such a large contribution to the public health of grandmothers with such a simple intervention.

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