Canadianisms
December 29, 2003, 9:12 PM

* pogey:
EI (Employment insurance). Money provided by the government for not working.

* mickey:
A small bottle of booze (13 oz) (A Texas mickey, on the other hand, is a ridiculously big bottle of booze, which, despite the name, is still a Canadianism through and through.)

* C.C.:
Canadian Club, a brand of rye. Not to be confused with "hockey stick," another kind of Canadian Club.

* beer parlour:
Like an ice cream parlour, but for Canadians.

* skidoo:
Self-propelled decapitation unit for teenagers, (Snow-Mobiles)

* muskeg:
Boggy swampland.

* duplex:
A single building divided in half with two sets of inhabitants,each trying to pretend the other doesn't exist while at the same time managing to drive each other crazy; metaphor for Canada's french and english.

* deke:
Used as a verb, it means "to fool an opponent through skillful misdirection." As a noun, it is used most often in exclamatory constructions, such as: "Whadda deke!" Meaning, "My, what an impressive display of physical dexterity employing misdirection and guile."

* chinook:
An unseasonably warm wind that comes over the Rockies and onto the plains, melting snow banks in Calgary but just missing Edmonton, much to the pleasure of Calgarians.

* Mountie:
Canadian icon, strong of jaw, red of coat, pure of heart. Always get their man! (See also Pepper spray, uses of.)

* snuck:
To have sneaked; to move, past tense, in a sneaky manner; non-restrictive extended semi-gerundial form of "did sneak." (We think.)

* ghost car:
An unmarked police car, easily identifiable by its inconspicuousness.

* impaired:
A charge of drunk driving. Used both as a noun and as an adjective (the alternative adjectival from of "impaired" being "pissed to the gills").

* S.O.L.:
Shit outta luck; in an unfortunate predicament.

* Stanfields:
Men's underwear, especially Grandpa-style, white cotton ones with a big elastic waistband and a large superfluous flap in the front and back!

* touque:
Canada's official National Head Apparel, with about the same suave sex appeal as a pair of Stanfields.

* chippy:
Behaviour that is inappropriately aggressive; constantly looking for a reason to find offense; from "chip on one's shoulder." (See Western Canada)

* shit disturber:
(See Quebec) a troublemaker or provocateur. According to Katherine Barber, editor in Chief of the Canadian Oxford Dictionary, "shit disturber" is a distinctly Canadian term. (Just remember that Western Canada is chippy and Quebec is a shit disturber, and you will do fine.) Please distribute to all your patriotic Canuck friends, eh!

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