A FantASStic Update
February 10, 2003, 11:33 PM

Well that was a fantASStic update last night. I've really got to hand it to myself I do think I have sounded so fake in so very long. I'm just really upset at things, I'd state that "sometime you just don't/can't give a fuck" but it seems like the rest of my world has been saying that for a bit now, and I wouldn't want to seem redundant.

I beat, which is odd seing as Allanon and I had a 4 hour naked nap together. It was wonderful, even if we were going to have mind blowing sex, the sleep was wonderful. I've got to state that I love skin! mmm skin, mmm touches.... mmmmmmm

I'm worried about school, but what else is new? I think/know I'm just to stupid to be good at this. My poor head space to a nasty dive tonight and I've been fighting with it all night, maybe that's why I'm so beat. I don't have the strenght to yell at myslef for being the biggest dunnerhead in the world. I'll let my mother do that tomorrow. And spend my nights dreaming about it.

Speaking of dreams I've noticed that anytime my mind wanders away, I'm flashing back to the dreams, as if I had just woken up from them... now I pay quite the attion to my dreams, make note, and remember them, but this seems a bit out of the ordanary. Somthing esle I'll have to dwell on when my mind comes back.

I had a good talk IMHO with Allanon tonight, I felt so uplifed after leaving him, maybe this is another reason I feel so pooped hmmm.... I really belive all you need is love.

Ok enough un matched waffling, bedtime for the little blaze

Later Days,
Blaze

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